come into my closet, come under my bed, where you'll find me hiding,
the fear in my head.

abuse in the past, now, where do i start, making my future,
healing my heart.

crushed, and broken, falling fast-
needing comfort, make it last.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Okay.... my friends!

I am smiling from ear to ear. Sophie...your comment in my email today has lifted my emotional burden notches....I haven't checked my email for a while, and finally am here reading from each of you, your support of me and whatever I am going through, where ever it may be. THANK YOU!

For each of your comments to my messes post....!
Here is what I have come to:

SapphireDreams: I hear that we all have messes in our homes and lives, and you are so right...little by little, one day at a time. So, I have decided to invest in some garbage bags, black and white. I plan to fill the black ones with items to donate, and the white ones with trash and recycling. I am going to take each day and do two bags. Where ever I feel like working. For one hour. That is my discipline...and it will get done.

Lisa Marie: The one day at a time....a motto, a standard to live by. Sometimes one moment at a time and I am OKAY with that. THaNkS. I also love the Pack Rat....I thought I was a hoarder, which terrified me, but Pack Rat fits better, and feels less intimidating...either way it is who I am, but not who I have to be.

Shadow: I love that poetic way of looking at it...the dust gets blown off...That was priceless. So I will just keep moving my piles, until I have successfully dusted everything off.

Jess Mistress of Mischief: HMMMM, I am right there with you about not inviting anyone in...but today, I straightened up what you can see when you walk through the door, did the dishes. I am off to vacuum and clean the bathroom before I shower. A little at a time. And I wonder, Have I given my life completely over to God....No, I don't believe I have, although I am working on it.

Each day now when I wake up instead of criticizing myself [which is what I was doing], I am praying, and praying with complete gratitude for waking up, in a home, with a bed, with a family who loves me and supports me, with rooms to clean, and junk to seems to be working a little.

PG: I am just so thankful that you are happy to hear from me in whatever condition I am in. You and Steve have been with me from the beginning of this healing and have been so right about so much. THaNkS for the support.

Cat: You too, from the beginning, and I have always appreciated your support, your words...I will keep on keeping on because then I will be good at keeping.

Vicki in AZ: You are always right there, cheering me on, and looking for anything that tells you I am okay. I can't tell you how much you mean to me that you diligently check in and care for me. Thanks for everything!!!! Seriously, everything you write in your healing world, all the places you see me. Thanks for seeing me. ♥u2.

Patty: It is good to hear that someone was able to accomplish what I am struggling with, and thanks for the trash bag idea....I am taking it seriously and give you credit for the idea...

Sarah: Thanks. I could not do this if I were alone.

Marsha: I love that you inspire me to come to terms with being imperfectly perfect. If I can be good at something it will be that. THANKS... and life will be okay in spite of it, you are so right. My kids are turning out great in spite of I am learning this truth every day.

Just Be Real: Thank you for sitting with me. Thank you for writing and inspiring so much healing here and modeling perfectly that we can heal.

♥ U ALL. Thanks.... I will be back to report!


Just Be Real said...

Thank you dear. Look forward to your next entry!! Blessings....

VICKI IN AZ said...

Hey Mile!
What a joy to see that you had posted.
You have some really great things to say here.
I am so moved by what you said to me.
Thank you for supporting me too. I truly feel like you are my sister.

I like the garbage bag Idea too. Think I'll try that and also be Thanking Heavenly Father like you more and more, I love the words that you used.
Thank you for your example.
♥ U Back

Cat said...

You sound adorable and sweet and I wish I was closer so I could give ya a big hug!

Prayer Girl said...

Bless you, bless you, ALWAYS!


Shadow said...

only good things should happen to a good soul such as you!

Anonymous said...

The fact that you get my comment makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside!!

sarah said...

Keep writing and keep healing ok. Sarah

who I was, who I am, who I plan to be...

i am trying to heal from severe childhood sexual, emotional,
physical, and mental abuse; and abandonment.

this is my story.

i have good and bad days, and some days the odds seem insurmountable.
i cling to the hope that healing will come to mend the shatter pieces of my heart, mind and body.

mile 191, well, you will understand as you read along.
mile 191, portions of my past have a link on the top right.
mile 191, bottoms up. hears to you and to me.

please, if you know me, just let me know you found me. i need honesty. (and please do not use personal names)
if you want to follow my story, please try to heal with me.
if you want to share with me, please do.
i will post bits of my pain as i can, and leave it here.
i once thought that i would publish...i haven't had the courage.

this is my closet, you are welcome to come in.
just know this is my refuge, healing takes place here,
maybe it will be a refuge to you too.

Quotes from Suvivors United - Standing Strong Together Against Abuse

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face.
Eleanor Roosevelt

When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.
Helen Keller

Success is not to be measured by the position someone has reached in life, but the obstacles he has overcome while trying to succeed.
Booker T. Washington

When I hear somebody sigh, 'Life is hard, ' I am always tempted to ask, 'Compared to what?'
Sydney Harris

Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.
Richard L. Evans

Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
Joshua J. Marine

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thanks CORNUT32! ♥

What a sweet award....and thanks for creating something so wonderful that can be passed along to bloggers who are indeed making a difference by sharing their lives.

I invite all my faithful and dear blogger friends to take this award. You indeed have made a difference in my life.

Thank you so much for being with me on my journey to heal....mile 191