Lost jobs, fighting, daily torment, and again on the move.
We moved from one town, to another within a year and I started tenth grade.
This was really a happy time for me.
I seemed to fit in finally, with the boys in school.
I was really good at flirtatious behavior and never took it too far with anyone.
I
was
just
having
fun.
After summer and the beginning of a new school year I thought that I was off and running.
I had a friend, a best friend for the first time ever. We did everything together. We hung out and laughed a lot. We caused some trouble, but mostly at our own expense.
We started the new year by sluffing a lot of our classes in the name of fun.
We drank a lot, and smoked behind the seminary building. We even smoked in the seminary building. We were having the time of our high school life.
We were pretty much on the path of loser.
and that was fine, i had been told that i wouldn't amount to anything. i wouldn't be anything more than someones whore. i was a failure and already being a failure there wasn't much room to grow. i fit the path that i had been emotionally abused to believe that i was to trod.
Then came the day. The day everything changed for us both. The day we sluffed at my house.
My stepfather was home: "Wouldn’t it be fun to play strip poker."
"Wouldn’t it be fun to get drunk....and naked?"
Why not, we were young, we had our whole lives a head of us.
Or so it would seem.
How could we both have known it would be the last day of our innocence, the first day of nightmares for both of us for the rest of your life.
How could we have ever known that that one day would change the rest of our lives?
4 comments:
You did not know. And it is not your fault. I am so sorry for what has happened to you. I want you to know that YOU are that blessing, that positive thing to come out of my difficult situation. If I had never shared all that stuff, our paths may never have crossed, you see I just became able to admit that it even happened at all, let alone that I was not totally responsible. Please never stop writting. Do whatever it takes to get these nightmares out of your soul. I know what you mean about putting it out there, it is scary, I have been a little fearful of "them" finding out about it too. But you know what? It is all the truth and it happened, and it happened to me, so they can go F-off! What are they gonna do? Sue me?LOL. Yes I am still tad bit bitter. Oh, well. Of course you can use that quote, I got from the al-anon book "Courage to Change" the Nov. 27th meditation for the day.
thank you.
I am sorry to be responding to an old post, but I know it is the begining of your blog and I feel I need to share my support.
First off, I too am very sorry this abuse took place for you!!!
I need to sit down and read through your whole blog. Thank you for being very transparent. Much appreciated!
I know this is from an old post but just wanted you to know that I am here for support. Maybe I don't have a lot to say sometimes. Just know I share my support with you.
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