come into my closet, come under my bed, where you'll find me hiding,
the fear in my head.

abuse in the past, now, where do i start, making my future,
healing my heart.

crushed, and broken, falling fast-
needing comfort, make it last.

Monday, March 29, 2010

mr. B...a GOOD day...and a busy week!

oh, how i wish i had taken the time on friday to tell you that i did have a GOOD day....a better day.

my morning was rough,
and my heart was broken
and aching
and shattered;
from my terrible temperament

no excuses...i was sad
and i is how i felt.

moments after i wrote, as if God felt he could prove His infinite power and my individual worth to mr. B walked through the door;
an angel sent, in my moment of distress.

he took the day off, to be with me.
'did I need anything?'

he couldn't have known

i weep in silence,
i don't call
and plead
and beg
and cause riots
for his attention, but he knew.

HOW did he know????

he knew, because He knew

oh, i am ashamed to be so pathetic at times, to be so needy, and yet in that moment, the balm that i needed to pull myself up and take on the day with a better light, more strength, was given to me....

and the character
that has grown in me
from my challenges,
and from the depth
of my darkness
came light.

we need people, we need each other....and i wish that i had just written a word or two to tell you....THANK YOU.

....thank you Steve...and Prayer Girl...
for your consistent care for me,
your thoughtful comments friday.

and thank you ALL, so many of you
who read, and write,
and comment,
and pray,
you who are here,
for me

---your love and prayers,
and the miracle that comes
of others praying
on our behalf
....for me,
for us.

mr. B walked through that door and his arms were the armor I needed to battle the depression and anxiety that was cresting within me....

It was a GOOD day!

a HAPPY day....and gave me strength
and anchored me in the HOPE
that I can have many GOOD and HAPPY days,

even when I feel broken and lonely and discouragement....

so CHEERS, my friends,
each of you...who are here
and hoping...

i, too, am here,
and working on healing....

i will be very busy for a week with family in town,
so my absence is only
that I am engaged in some good works,
I will be back....late next week!

and i hope to have a HAPPY update
and to find you all here,
healing with HOPE, LIGHT,
and having your own GOOD DAY S
from time to time!

mile 191


Steve E said...

Neither PG nor I remember who is Mr B...maybe it is not ours to know? But if...then remind me, if you have a moment.

And thank you for the THANK YOU! You are sweet, and light IS shining on you. Open your eyes, we do also, and we will all face this wonderful (meaning "full of wonder") life together!


Lily said...

I am so happy to hear your day turned around! I have been thinking about you and praying for your peace :)

mile191 said...

mr. B is my sweetheart of more than 17 years. the man who knows the worst things about me, endures with me and loves me regardless. he is my beautiful sweetheart....and deserves a medal of honor, for loving me on my GOOD days and making my not so good days bearable! ♥

thanks for asking....and ur welcome!

Shadow said...

that's the reward of trust and love. someone who just knows....

LeShel said...

hooray for the night in shining armor.

Anonymous said...

It's nice to see that you are happy!

Anonymous said...

When everything is coming your way, you are in the wrong lane.............................................

Anonymous said...


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VICKI IN AZ said...

Mile I am so delighted to read this beautiful post which shows that shiny spirit of yours. You are just an inspiration with so much light you are blinded by it. I see and feel it and am blessed by it. ♥ U

who I was, who I am, who I plan to be...

i am trying to heal from severe childhood sexual, emotional,
physical, and mental abuse; and abandonment.

this is my story.

i have good and bad days, and some days the odds seem insurmountable.
i cling to the hope that healing will come to mend the shatter pieces of my heart, mind and body.

mile 191, well, you will understand as you read along.
mile 191, portions of my past have a link on the top right.
mile 191, bottoms up. hears to you and to me.

please, if you know me, just let me know you found me. i need honesty. (and please do not use personal names)
if you want to follow my story, please try to heal with me.
if you want to share with me, please do.
i will post bits of my pain as i can, and leave it here.
i once thought that i would publish...i haven't had the courage.

this is my closet, you are welcome to come in.
just know this is my refuge, healing takes place here,
maybe it will be a refuge to you too.

Quotes from Suvivors United - Standing Strong Together Against Abuse

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face.
Eleanor Roosevelt

When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.
Helen Keller

Success is not to be measured by the position someone has reached in life, but the obstacles he has overcome while trying to succeed.
Booker T. Washington

When I hear somebody sigh, 'Life is hard, ' I am always tempted to ask, 'Compared to what?'
Sydney Harris

Don't let life discourage you; everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was.
Richard L. Evans

Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
Joshua J. Marine

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thanks CORNUT32! ♥

What a sweet award....and thanks for creating something so wonderful that can be passed along to bloggers who are indeed making a difference by sharing their lives.

I invite all my faithful and dear blogger friends to take this award. You indeed have made a difference in my life.

Thank you so much for being with me on my journey to heal....mile 191