honest scrap AWARD!

THANK YOU BUTTERFLY KISSES, FOR THE AWARD!

...with this award i have to post 10 HONEST things about myself.

FYI: i posted this on my family blog too, some of you might have seen it there. it is important for me to keep this journal private, but i also felt that the HONEST SCRAP was best suited HERE. so, as i shared both places, please keep my identity here for here.
THANK you my friends.

here goes:

1. i really am not good at keeping up with my house. i save EVERYTHING. i want to de-clutter but don't have the courage to do it. IT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I have a hard time having people over. I never used to be like this. A year ago I had my idea of PERFECTION.

Somewhere I crash and burned, and we are all suffering for it. My kids are on board to organize, they have the energy so it will get done.

2. Instead of food storage, we have toys and chocolate. I stress that we don't have enough to provide in time of necessity. This goes along with number one. De-clutter, and get food storage in order. And with number three, as you get the feeling that I am making a list: TO DO

3. I make crazy lists. I write everything down that I need to do everyday. Without the list I can't seem to function. I spend more time making the list than it would take to do have the things on the list. I reorganize my list; for efficiency, which requires rewriting them. I live by the list. I also make my kids live by a LIST. A checklist: home from school, wash hands, check, snack, check, pet care, check, chore, check, practice piano/guitar, check, homework, check, help with dinner chores, check, dinner, check, scriptures, check, journal, check, brush teeth, check, pajamas, check, prayers, check, 30 minutes reading, check. [compulsive behaviour passed along to the kids, another need for therapy when they get older.]

4. I can eat a half a gallon of ice cream during one movie.

5. I am writing a healing journal to try to break free from the pain of abuse and abandonment in my childhood. [that was a hard one to write, and not embelish or minimize, just honest] I wont ramble about this one.

6. I blog in layers. One for family, private, one for cyber friends [now i am being too honest], and one to spill my guts, my healing, very private.

7. I blog too much. (ouch, that was hard to admit.)

8. I know that there are some people reading this that will talk about me behind my back. I know who they are and it does hurt my feelings. Hey, you know who you are. This was not easy for me to be honest about. How about we just try to be nice?

9. I love serving in my church. I may be a broken mess about my gospel, but I believe in it with all my heart. I love the Savior, he is my friend, my partner in healing, my guide. I am thankful.

10. My kids are my delight, they are my everything. When I am with them, and with my husband, all is well; laughter is present, sometimes tears,

we may not have it all together, but together we have it all.

Amen to all these honest revelations about me. It is more than I wanted to know, so I can imagine how you feel. I just have to remind myself that this exercise is good for me, and that it is for ME. So there I have it. And what have I learned, oh, the growing pains of being honest about yourself.

I NOW AWARD:

Prayer Girl

AlkySeltzer

Atiyanna

Lulabelle

Gabrielle Moonlight

Psych Client

Amysplash

strong and determined

shadow

broken child

quiet rage

one tough cookie: Kim

April Optimist

survivors can thrive

If you don't want to do this, don't feel any pressure.

This is my honest sCRAP.

Actually, this is the same thing that I posted on my family blog. This will be the first thing that I blend about myself; who I am, in both places [besides my Sunday Funnies! Which are all real; honest! ☺]. This is HONESTLY me. #8 doesn't have anything to do with YOU all here. You are my support, I appreciate you. So this is more like a SHOUT OUT.

THanks aGAin. for your support. ♥