i am thankful that i have a home to sleep,
to stay warm, food and clothes.
...
tonight i have a lot on my mind. my mom is still homeless, and now she is going through typically unimaginable things. except i can imagine them, i have been there.
she said, this is killing me. i said to her, I WAS 9 years old. I survived....you will too.
then i wonder if is should take her in. give her an apartment we have, and bless her with the very things i am thankful for. then I remember, the abandonment, ...but have i forgiven.
i need some sleep. and to think and pray about these ramblings. there is so much to it. i will try to sleep and figure it out, in prayer, tomorrow.....today....
i wonder if the effects of being abandoned ever go away? and will i ever feel safe...
[sorry, no sunday funies...an apartment/condo building burned, and many people (80+) are displaced...i was helping with the Red Cross. I just didn't get to it.
By the way. The RED CROSS is in desperate need of donations, for homeless, for children, for disaster recovery. After watching them in action, they are amazing, they are angels.
If you have the means, find a Red Cross in your area and donate anything you can. Your time...see if you can be trained to assist, or just show up.
Volunteer: while I was there an angel helped me, and I was given the strength to continue to help those who were burdened by the disaster. Truly sad. Many of them lost everything, others have major damage. ..and all of them are homeless...won't be able to consider returning for a year. Awful
so I am thankful to be home, and I am going to try to sleep...
5 comments:
Regarding helping your mother-I was abandoned by my mother as well, put into foster care when I was 12 after numerous suicide attempts.
When she was dying of cancer, I was her home health nurse. It stressed me out, it wore me out, and it was one of the hardest things I have ever done.
Several people asked my "Why? Why are you doing this for her when she abandoned you when you needed her the most?"
My reply-because it's the right thing to do.
This may or may not be relevant to your situation-you have to think of the safety and well being of your family first. But I realized I would rather help her when she needed it then live with the guilt if I let her die alone. Does that make sense?
I hope you find the answers, and peace, that you need.
hi there beautiful mile i am so proud of you keep up the good work and healing will come iam here for you always love and always afe hugs amy
Hi,
I read your post and wanted to share something. It is so vital for you to know that you don't need to be at the point of forgiveness yet. In the church you and I attend, forgiveness is stressed over and over again, and while it is important and possible, there is no rush to get there. It's okay to put forgiveness on the back burner while you are healing and know that you will get there when the time is right for you.
You are wonderful and amazing. Sending prayers and hugs your way!
(((Hugs)))
Mile I have been where you are with my mother. she will be homeless someday she is just that bad with money and other things.
I think we do what we feel comfortable doing. I agree with the above poster about guilt. I wouldn't want to take my mom in, it will be more trouble than ever. but I wonder about how I'll feel later on and do I need more guilt? I'm not so sure.
do what you think is right and what you are comfortable doing. either way, I support you
I totally relate to being abandoned I was not 9 but a teen when my mother finally said get out - and I did - while still in highschool.
Just this past weekend I foudn a teen in my alley, brough her inside gave her a coat and shoes and contacted shelters for her after feeding her I drove her to one.
Now as a mother, every time my oldest son says he is leaving my heart skips a beat and I can only hope that kharma will take care of him if he should find himself in a bad situation.
As for forgiveness, listen to your heart sometimes we just need to be ready before it can happen.
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